Archive | March 2016

Love Without Color

Hey lovelies!

I know it’s been a while since I’ve blogged but it’s my last month of the semester and stuff is getting really real… RIP GPA.

Let’s cut to the chase…

I get a lot of questions about why do I choose to be in a relationship with a white man. In all honesty, I really didn’t even think about Skylar’s skin color when I got with him. At first, I didn’t even know we would end up where we are today. (That story is for another time.) I just was in a state of being open to any other “love” than what I was receiving in my past relationships.

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My parents never told me that I couldn’t be with someone of my skin color or race. They had always been adamant about them being happy with whomever I am with as long as they treated me right and loved me. Beyond that, I had some people who I loved who weren’t against it but were definitely not “head over heels” in love with the idea.

I have received backlash from many of my peers due to my relationship some from my own community. Specifically some men who believe that I am missing out on something because I am with Skylar. Some women say that they are jealous or want an interracial relationship because they see our relationship.

Let’s stop at that note… 

What in the actual heck?!?!? I never sought out an interracial relationship. I always loved people for who they were. It just so happens that Skylar is white and that makes us fall into this “interracial couple” category. I am just in a relationship, not an interracial relationship, not a bwwm relationship, not a mixed couple. Just your ordinary relationship. Our relationship has its ups and downs. It’s nothing different from any other relationship that anyone else could have.

If it were not him, I would be with someone else rather they be black, white, hispanic, or any other person. First of all, if you can deal with me then you are already one step ahead of the game.

Love is love. Love has no color. I fell in love with Skylar because of his personality not because of the color of my skin. If you love someone, don’t let the color of your skin stop you from pursuing them. Love comes in different shapes and sizes.

In high school, I had quite a few friends who parents were completely against them dating someone who wasn’t white. Their excuse was because “we didn’t raise them like that” or “we just rather them be with someone like us.” I honestly would rather those parents to shut the heck up and let their children live! That’s not an excuse! If the right person was to come by and love your child, your brother, or your sister, you would be totally against it??? Color doesn’t tell your story. Color doesn’t decide whether or not you are a good person. Color doesn’t protect your child from hurt or pain. Color is just merely that…

just color.

Let’s talk about it.

Would you date someone that didn’t look like you? Why do you feel that some parents are so against it? Comment below. Discuss it with your family and friends.

Thank you for taking out some time to read my blog. Stay tuned and as always…

Love them, love her, love him, love you, love me

Love Karaa

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How to be a real and true friend…

I’m not trying to be shady but (insert palm tree here) many of us need a re-up on knowing how to be a real and true friend. Many of us are real friends. Many of us are true friends. But not many of us are both.

Let’s start out with Mr. Webster’s take on what a friend is so we can learn how to be a friend:

Definition of friend

  1. 1:  a person who has a strong liking for and trust in another person

  2. 2:  a person who is not an enemy <friend or foe>

  3. 3:  a person who helps or supports something <She was a friend to environmental causes.>

In this definition, many key words appear such as trust, helps, liking, and supports.
Now these words aren’t in the definition for poops and giggles, these are in there because this what a friend is.
A person that you do not trust is NOT your friend. That person is also not your boyfriend or girlfriend. The “friend” portion of the word must be dropped because we have to trust in them in order for them to earn that portion. They now just become a BOY and GIRL. If I can’t trust you enough to have a conversation without you running off to tell her, him and all of them, we are not friends. We are just acquaintances or just mere “hi and byes.” Now don’t get me wrong just because someone is your friend, that doesn’t mean you just trust them with your first-born child. You need to have enough common sense and intuition to learn what level of trust to give someone and if you lack any of those two above call 1-800-JESUS. He will always answer. Won’t he do it?
The next word is “help.”A friend is going to help you in your time of need with whatever he or she has to give. That doesn’t mean that if you are always going somewhere broke, your friend should always pick up your tab. It means that one day you might just buy lunch when she is low on money for the week. Then when she is back up and you are low, she get’s you. Help is not always monetary! I REPEAT, helping someone doesn’t always have to be a monetary thing. Most of the time, helping should be just sharing some words of encouragement and some wanted advice. Yes, I put wanted advice but true friends will sometimes give you unwanted advice that you truly need to hear to wake you up from the cloud of marshmallow peeps we daydream on.
The word “like” is self-explanatory for the most part.
Support is the biggest thing friends give one another. Support to do the unexpected and the risky things we dream of in the back of our heads if only Grandma wouldn’t judge you haha! Support to be yourself. Support to make dumb mistakes sometimes. Support to never let you make those dumb mistakes again. Support to pick you up when you are weak. Support to use each other back to back to lift each other up. Support to follow your dreams. If someone isn’t supporting you without good reason (many times we don’t see it as a good reason) , they are doing nothing but adding extra weight.
Now that we know what a friend is and what he or she is supposed to do, we need to make sure that we are doing these things ourselves. Before we are able to make friends, we have to make sure we can hold ourselves to the standards we plan on holding them to.
Thank you all so much for all of the genuine support I have received after my first blog post! Stay tuned and as always…

Love them, love her, love him, love you, love me

Love Karaa

The Crap No One Likes to Talk About…

I am beyond super excited to finally start the blog that I have been dreaming about. Welcome!!!

Now, I’m just going to cut to the chase…

I am your best friend. When I mean your best friend, I mean the one you always dreamed of but never had for whatever reason. The Beyonce to your Kelly, the Batman to your Robin, the Tina Fey to your Amy Poehler, the Jay to your Silent Bob, the Garth to your Wayne….that’s me!

Now let’s really get to the chase…

Situation: Talking to a friend about clothes and she said she had some but wasn’t sure if I would like them because they were “white girl clothes.” First off, I took one of those deep, saving your life type breaths because I didn’t understand what the heck she meant by white girl clothes and I didn’t want to go slap off in a rant. As far as I knew, clothes were clothes. This situation reminded me of the crap I have heard all of my life. I am supposedly not “black” enough to be black and not “white” enough to be white. This seems to be the case for any person of color, tint, or hue who doesn’t speak with slang all the time and has education but still likes great music (shoutout to Mom for blasting GREAT music early in the morning everyday and singing in the car…she is the real MVP.) Although, this situation was really small, it shows me that we are still not there yet in the world. But that’s not what this blog is about now is it?

Next… this election. Now sweetie, we could go on and on about the craziness that is going on in our country but there is not enough time in the day or in the world so we will just sum it up for you. The Republican Party candidates= H-E- double hockey sticks NOOOO! The Democratic Party candidates= see above. I just wish there was an undo button for this election. Can we undo all of the candidates and choose completely new ones?!?!? I see at least one good platform point in each person’s campaign but no one stands out to me as being the person I want to have the highest position in this country. What makes it more sad is that this will be my first year to vote like many others!

Finally…being you. I absolutely hate that we, as people, can’t be real with one another. I rather someone come out to me and tell me the truth than to lie to me about who they are. The truth always comes out either through your actions or through some slick words that fall out of the side of your mouth. Either way, the real you will be revealed. Yes, it’s not okay in all settings to be a racist but I rather know you are a racist than for me to be friends with you and you and your family won’t even allow me in your home. *cough cough*  I rather know you for all that you are. I rather be real with you than for me to be fake.

I hope I didn’t scare you off by this long post but for the first time in a long time, I feel like I could finally release! Stay tuned…

Love them, love her, love him, love you, love me

Love Karaa